Pass the Oreos.

You know how your metabolism slows down with age? Does that mean at some point you should just rid yourself of those size 26 jeans that you could only fit into because you worked out like a maniac and denied yourself starches for the few months leading up to your wedding? I'm a year and a half into marriage and while I'm determined not to completely let myself go, I'm wondering if I'm fighting an uphill battle that's practically impossible to win.

Having the goal of looking and feeling great on my wedding day fear of being the center of attention in a potentially ill-fitting wedding dress was a pretty powerful motivator to go to the gym with serious regularity, even when was ass-cold in the middle of January. And in the last year I've realized how badly I need a new goal to help me get motivated, but I can't seem to land on anything that does the trick.

I know this is kind of every woman's problem, but I worry that I spend way more time than the average everywoman thinking about it. Not just thinking about it. Worrying about it. Obsessing about it, even. I'm a healthy, educated, empowered individual and I beat myself up about squeezing my almost 30 year old butt (which, thanks to my slowing metabolism, is just plain different than my 28 year old butt). If I could just channel all the energy I spend on it toward something productive, like volunteering or unpacking that suitcase from last week's Thanksgiving travels, my life would just feel better.

This is the first Thursday I've been in town for a little while, so I'm going to start if off by visiting my trainer. Sessions with him often make my muscles sore through the following weekend, so at least I'll have a few days with that lingering, painful reminder that one day this week I actually worked out, and that's better than nothing.

By the way, I realize I missed two days of blogging. My younger self might have felt ashamed for proclaiming a self-imposed challenge and then immediately failing. But not almost 30 year old me. I'm cool with a little failure and feeling very smug about the whole thing.